Christmas

Awwwwwwwwww where did Christmas go - it's all gone, it's all gone!

Don't want it to go!

I hope you all had a lovely time! It's Stuart's birthday today yay!!!!

Happy Birthday Stuart!

I got lots of pressies I did. John kept pretending he hadn't got me anything! hmmmph - I really believed him and was getting all sad - how childish is that! Even though Im 42 I still likes my pressies I do!

Anyway, I was very pleased coz John got me a box set of the Friend's DVD's - the complete series - yep! Series 1 to 10!!! I have been trying to collect them for years and now I dont have to - Ive got them - and Im having a great time watching from the beginning to the end!! yay!!

I got lots of other lil pressies - I got a lovely silver watch from my Mum and Dad and a lovely silver necklace. I got some games and I got a game for my DS - its Deal or No Deal - Im a bit disappointed with that - its a bit boring.  I got two books - Russel Brand's Booky wook and a Magaret Attwood book - The Blind Assassin. I got lots and lots of smellies and sweets! yay - Im gonna get fat but least I will smell good.  I got a Scene It game about Friends so when Ive watched all the episodes I will be super good at that! There are about 360 epidsodes and Im on number 6 LOL!!!

Right Im off upstairs to play darts with the boys - we got a new dart board and new darts - so we all dart mad now! LOL

Love Laine xxx

P.S. We do have a champion Dart player lives next door to us - Adrian Gray - but Im not about to invite him in and give us lessons LOL

Happy Christmas

 

 

Hello everybody!

I just come to say I wish you all a very Happy Christmas - I hope you get all you want and that you have been good all year!  Happy New Year too and I hope 2008 brings all of you love and happiness.

Thank you all so much for all your support and love you have shown me over the last year - its been a tough year for me and an exciting one too - you have all been there for me! Thanks.

Love Laine xxxxx

Last day

It was my last day at the school today.

It felt wierd. I had lots of pressies - it was really touching - some of the cards and comments I had were so so lovely - what lovely people I worked with. Only one person was wierd and off with me - she is the deputy head and I worked in her class everyday for the first hour and half. I did lots for her and tried really hard to impress her. This morning she gave out presents to all the adults in the class, in front of me, and did not give me one! She did not thank me for working with her or even said goodbye. I can't believe it.  The other class I worked in - they were lovely and made me cry with all the lovely gifts and comments.  They didnt want me to go!

I went to see the Headteacher and he said he wanted me to know that he doesn't want me to lose touch with the school and that if another job comes up I should definately apply for it. He said maybe I could keep in touch and do some voluntary work with the school. He wouldnt let me go out the door until he was satisfied that I knew that he thought I was good!

I went to see the teacher who teaches all the little children - the 4 and 5 year olds and I am going to go in to her on a Wednesday afternoon - so I havent really seen the last of that school yet and Im not going to let go of my dreams.

Laine xxx

Sad

I'm sad, I dont want to leave the school. Only one more week to go. Its the Christmas Carol concert tonight and it's all Christmassy at school and the kids are lovely and all cuddly and nise.  Hee hee I likes that new word nise! My little Tia taught me that she did.

James told me that Im his best friend today and gave me a big James hug! Bless him.

Im holding on to my dream.

Laine x

For Stuart

 

This is my dress! £70.00 from Oasis. Sorry no photo with me in it!

John didnt take one of me! But next time I will get one - at the next Christmas party! hee hee!

No Sara - honest -  he didnt take a pic of me! xxxxx

Little Tia who I work with wrote a little note in her folder, it said; "Mrs Sayers is nise, she is kind to me and I like her. She is kind and she plays with me." Awwwwwww now that brought tears to my eyes. I'm really going to miss those little children. I really am.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

black dress

OOOOH I forgot to tell you. I bought a gorgeous black dress on Saturday I did. I wore it on Saturday night and John told me that I looked the most gorgeous and sexiest girl in the room. I wasn't. But, John says I was. hee hee xxxxx

Journals

Right!! Sara Sara!!! I will still do my Journal - on one condition!! You don't mind the fact that Im not a good journaler! hmmph!

I would never ever want to upset my Sara Sara - especially at Christmas!

And I can't stop my journal coz otherwise Joan would stop too so Im not gonna!

Laine xx

Powder Mills Hotel

The Powder Mills Hotel.

This is where John and I stayed this weekend! Awww it was lovely. But, I might add if you do look on the website obviously those photos were taken on a lovely sunny day - it really was not like that this weekend! The weather was just awful.

It was my work's christmas do. Well wont be my work after Christmas will it! I'm still a bit fed up about that! Anyway, John and I were determined to have a good time.  I took the kids to my Mum and Dad's on Friday night - and Oscar!  Then on Saturday afternoon John and I took ourselves off to get ready at the hotel then at 7.15 we met in the function room for my staff do.  The food was lovely, the disco was good and we had a good boogy!  It did feel wierd though that Im leaving and lots of people kept asking me why! The thing is I dont really know why, apart from the fact that they say they have run out of funding. But, funny how they been taking on new staff lately! Obviously my face didnt fit! I think Im better off out of it!

I've another staff do on 5th January! YAY. Coz Im going back to the holiday park Ive now been invited to their do too! Two dos!!!

Anyway, Im smiley happy today and John and I fell in love all over again at the weekend.Awwwwwww

Love Lainey

p.s. Im am so sorry Ive not been to your journals - Im not really a very good journal person at the moment - Im thinking of stopping my journal - I cant keep writing in mine then not visiting all of you.

p.p.s. Thanks Jen for my card!!!!

email addres for the over 60s

Awwwwwwwwwwww and another awwwwwwwwwww.

My Mum and Dad, bless them, have bought their first computer! Awwww. My Dad is 70 and my Mum is 63 and they have never ever had a puter in their life! They bought an HP laptop like the one I got coz my Dad likes mine! I likes mine too.

Anyway, my Dad phoned me tonight to tell me that they are setting up their new puter and they are filling in the registration thingy that HP puts on all its new puters! I said aww dont bother with that specially as you dont have internet connected yet. I said wait til you have internet which they get fixed up next week. Anyway, my Dad says well we have filled in most of it and put our email in and everything. So I said, "Er, Dad you dont have email yet, you aint got internet yet!" - LOL this is so so funny - I just had to share it with ya LOL  awwwwwwwww - Well my Dad then says "yeah we have - we made one!" - "What is it then I says" - "It's Johnandbarb@home.com" my Dad says. Awwwww, awww how sweet!! How funny. I said noooooooooooooo Dad you cant just choose one! I said you have to wait til your internet provider gives you one. So my Dad said "Oh, think we will stop filling out this form then!" Awwwwww! I told my kids and they had hysterics - I just so love that email address!

Laine xxx

Im hello

Here I am again! I am still alive. Sorry my journal friends - not been very good lately.

A couple of weeks ago I asked my boss if I will still be in a job after Christmas because my contract runs our in December. I also asked if he would be able to give me extra hours.  He raised his eyebrows and looked into the air and said why didnt I come to him sooner he had just employed more people.  He didnt think I was interested in the job anymore!! Well I told him that I felt like he was disappointed with me because I couldnt do that job in the afternoons - the one with the unruly kids and the most challenging child in the school.  I was new and the teacher was new and we were left in a horrible situation.  He said that he had hoped I was strong enough to deal with it.  But, he said he wasnt disappointed or cross with me.  But, he said I should have explained to him sooner that I was interested in more work! Hmmmph!! He has known me for 6 years and known I have always in that time wanted to be a teacher! Also I have done my morning job superbly - even if I say so myself!

Anyway, they have now run out of funding for my job. They haven not even received the money for what I have done already.  The do not know if they will get anymore funding at all after Christmas. So they advised me to look for another job to be on the safe side. I feel like they have just forgotten about me - there is now no positions available they are fully staffed. It could be that the boys I work with could get statements then there would be funding but they dont know when that will be.  The teachers I work with are really sad, Im really sad!! I know its been tough for me there but I am starting to get stronger now! Typical!

Anyway, I went to the holiday park yesterday where I used to work.  My old boss was there and my friends. I burst into tears. They gave me coffee and hugs! I've now got my old job back!! Hee hee a cleaner with a degree but at least my hoover wont answer back! Im feeling really wierd at the moment - my plans are not going to plan!

Laine xxx

Dee

I went to see my Nurse Practioner today called Dee - she is lovely - I likes her.

Anyway, she tested me and talked to me and stuff and she said the good news is that I'm not suffering from depression. I am suffering from anxiety and she said if that isnt dealt with then I could get depression.  She said it is very common to suffer from a form of depression when you finish a degree for about up to 6 months after it. Stuart said that to me too! :o)  Anyways, she has recommended natural remedies rather than put me on anti-depressants - if I don't feel any better or get worse then I should go back to her.

She said that I should talk to my family - all of them - kids too and tell them how I feel sometimes and remind them that Mummy needs to be noticed and not take for granted. She said that I'm lacking self-worth and thats common for someone who has been through what I am going through. Like finishing a degree, moving on, new job etc.  She said I should find 'me' time - like swimming, walking - stuff that makes happy stuff in my brain! She said that it should be totally time away from the kids and stresses of life etc. So I'm gonna make sure I go swimming once a week with my friends like I used to. :o)

I really liked talking to her - it felt like I'd popped a big balloon and it all came out - I didn't even cry like I thought I would.  She said that I should ask my boss for appraisals and know if I'm doing a good job - she said that I need to be praised to build my confidence up :o) - and she thinks I'm being hard on myself and expecting too much to soon. She said I should start to feel betterer in a few months if I learn to relax and stop worrying!  She gave me two little books to read - one about stress and one about exercise to a healthy life.  I did feel better after talking to her. I wanted to hug her!

Laine xxxx

What shall I do?

Hmmph!

I'm not in a good place again - my mind is all over the place - I feel anxious inside and I want to scream out loud - I'm not like really really down or really even sad - I just feel confused and anxious - thats the only way I can describe it.

Had long chat with John today - he said I should give up the school if it's making me ill - it's what I've wanted for a long time - to work in a school and eventually become a teacher - but I'm not sure I'm strong enough - not at the moment - my nerves are bad - really bad - oooh had feeling of de ja vue then! I'm now feeling its so right to talk to the Nurse Practioner tomorrow - the Doctor isnt there so they put me with her - at least I'm still going! And at least I will be talking to a professional person.  She helped me last year with a lot of that women's stuff - so I'm pleased it will be her.

Don't think I should write anymore of my thoughts down now - well all I want to say is that the boy I work with who is autistic this morning went mad - and I didnt deal with it very well at all - the teacher was watching and I felt like I failed him and her. So probably why I'm feeling anxious and wierd now.  Thing is will I ever be strong enough or have the knowledge to know how to deal with children like him? I really don't know what to do when he gets angry with me. :0(

Anyways, I'm going to get help.

Love Laine xxx

What do you all make of this

I got this comment posted on Myspace today - Obviously Im not Margaret - but think I might be going to www.3cash4.com and earn meself some money - what do ya think? LOL !!!

P.S. Notice I think of you Stuart and I make a bigger font - not like that Sara!! Hmmmph xxxx

###########

Hey Margaret sorry about that I must have given you the wrong one.
That's funny because I tried that one a while ago too, the one I gave you,
and it made me all mad because they sucked real bad, and they didn't pay too
good either they offered like sweepstakes and stuff instead of cash.
But anyways, the right site is www.3cash4.com , it's the one I am making $650 a week with putting in about 23 hours
a week, sometimes up to like 30 hours if I'm daydreaming.
After you get your membership make sure you sign up with the companies on page
one in the members section because they are the ones that pay you the most,
I got $75 for one that took me 25 minutes today. You'll see what I'm talking
about when you get in there.
Jackie started taking them too and she's making $800 a week, it's making me
so mad because I'm the one that showed her which one to sign up with now she's
making more than me.
Alright well me and Andrea are getting ready to leave now, just give me a call
or I'll catch you on here and let me know if you have any problems with your
membership. TTYS hun

Riff raff

They let any old duffer in these days

Yay Stuart! Stuart is in the house!!! xxx

ng wBorrowed, not stolen...

Good evening all of the people that read Lainey's journal.  I am here to let you know that I have stolen it.  That's right.  Lainey's journal now belongs to me.  I am Sara, by the way.  Hello :o)

I'm lying.  I didn't really steal it.  I just borrowed it for this one entry.  I will put it back where I found it when I have finished.  I promise.

Waves at everybuddy, hello you, and you, and yooouuu.  You look different from here.  How strange.  Mr Brainwhispers... your hair looks all sticky uppy, it never looks that way from my journal.  Stuart... what are you wearing?  You look more like a warrior dwarf than a hobbit :o)  Lainey... is that a bar of Galaxy?  Can I have a bite?  Mmm, yumbly :o)

I have finished.
Wipes of smudgy Galaxy fingerprints and puts it back.

How did you know I was eating Galaxy Sara Sara!!! hmmmph xxxxx Hee hee we can write the same entry! How cool is that! Love Lainey Laine xxxx

I could smell it m'dear.  I have special "smelling out Galaxy" powers.  Did you not know that?  Oh, and don't be hmmmphing at me ;o)
xxxxx

OOPS sorry Sara wasn't really hmmmmphing at you! I loves you! I didnt even see you do another entry right in front of my eyes! The galaxy is now back in the cupboard! ;0) xxxxxx

That's what you think ;o)
xxxxxxx

You ate some! You ate some you did!! xxxxxxxx

Ate some?  I ate it all.  Smiles, then pats her happy belly :o)  xxxxxxxxx

I nearly did something then - it starts with h and ends with g! But, I won't do it! I'll let you have the satisfaction of eating all my Galaxy coz it made your belly happy! :0)

You be careful with that thing that starts with h and ends with g m'dear.  Unless... did you mean hmmmphing?  Oh, well that's ok then ;o)

LOL! Now the one you were thinking of hun is a doing word! I was saying a describing word. xxxxx

A doing word?  ???  I'm glad that you were saying a describing word and not a doing word.  I was nearly quite shocked.  I was ;o)  xxxxx

Did the doing word at the weekend hun ;o)

I just did the describing word.

What on your own hunni???

The describing word... the DESCRIBING word!! 

OOOOH Yeah sorry hun. You can do the DOING word at the weekend, hee hee. whoops my mistake!

:o)

Doctors

Hello everyone,

Once again, thanks for all your comments and I'm so sorry I havent been to visit you!

I have made an appointment to see the Doctor on Wednesday this week at 2.15pm. It's been bothering me how I felt last weekend - it was bad last week and I don't want to feel like that again. It scares me. This weekend was really good just me and John but there were occassions where I nearly blew it and got tetchy over silly things. Why am I doing that?

I also went to see my boss today, the headteacher, at school.  He said I should have come and seen him ages ago. I was worried that since I gave up afternoons he didnt feel I was up to the job. He said that he thought I had lost interest so that's why he hadnt offered me anymore work. Anyway, he knows now that I am willing to stay on at the school and do more hours. He isnt cross with me! So thats good.

Laine xxxx

Whoops sorry - that wasn't a silly entry was it!

bleh!

wierd

My last entry gone a bit wierd I think! The font gone silly. oh well x

Being too boring

I'm not going to be boring anymore - just visited my Sara in herspace and she says that she should be silly again - yay I'm up for that Sara! I've decided that I'm gonna get silly too! And her man, Chris, he made a fantastically funny comment on my journal yesterday that cheered me up no end!!! LOL I put it underneath here so you can all see it! Not everyone will find it funny but I did!  Anyways, its silliness from now on - it is! NO more moaning and being depressed!! I had a lovely weekend - just John and I! I met an old friend on the train on the way up! Brilliant to catch up with her and I'm gonna make sure we keep in touch! Also I took John to the Natural History Museum and he had never ever been! Can you believe that! Well not everyone has been have they but I have loads! I loves the dinosaurs! Scary they are! John loved them too!

 

Its anti-bullying week this week - so all you bullies beware!!!! grrrrr

 

 

 

"I think your are a little under the weather from eating infected crisps.
I saw on the news about some Bacon crisps that were infected with alien DNA and it gives you sore itchy blisters around your bumhole and makes you feel depressed and tired and stuff. Then 15 months later an alien worm crawls out of your bellybutton and will mate with your John.
Its true!
:o)"
 That's an alien smiley that is.

Tags: anti-bullying week

you are all so kind

I do feel a bit better today.

Thank you for all your support. Michelle your right - being able to write down my feelings is good and helps. My Mr Stuart, I do know what it is but I'm scared of admitting anything is wrong - I just find it hard to pick up the phone and make an appointment to see that Doctor - I'm scared Stuart! How silly is that!

I did have a long chat with John today - we went out to lunch. It really helped talking to him.  He said that we have got into a rut and he has felt down lately too. He is right, we used to go out and about and do so  much. But, just lately I can't be bothered - I'd sooner just stay in - it takes me ages to get up in the morning and then I can't be bothered to get dressed til after lunch! So yes Stuart your right I do have to go see him - but I keep coming up with buts!

You see today I go back to school and Im Mrs happy smiley Mrs Sayers again - and it does lift me to be with the kids - but is it just a mask - the people I work with think Im such a happy bubbly person - they dont see me at the weekend! And, why is it that when we are in a mood with our families we meet a complete stranger and then we are all happy and polite! That's strange!

Right my task for this week is to pluck up the courage to phone the Doctor - trouble is I have never ever even met my Doctor! I wonder if I could see the nurse instead - I know her - I likes her - could talk to her. Hmmmmm. Someone needs to sort my head out! LOL.

Sara Sara I loves you!

Lainey xxxxx

Tags: friendship

End of the weekend

End of the weekend and I feel like I've wasted it. Spoilt it - been moody all weekend!

I don't think John understands me - I think he is very pissed off with me! That just makes me worse. I think 'oh well, go and be pissed off with me then, see if I care'! See that's how I'm thinking! Not good is it! Now I feel lost and empty coz he has gone to take Christopher home - he will be gone a good 4 hours now as he will pop in and see his Mum and Dad - no doubt to moan about me.  I get this paranoia thing that everyone is moaning about me and I think ' let them!' I dont care! I really don't! Thats not like me is it?

When I got up this morning John was already in the boys room chatting to them about decorating their bedroom - I looked in on them and then walked out again. None of them stopped to speak to me - John said later that I had a face like thunder - I said No I didnt its just I couldnt see.  I told John I felt left out - he always doing stuff and talking with the boys.  He said it's all in my head. I dont think it is!

John and I had a lovely walk this afternoon along Hastings Seafront - we had an ice cream and sat down and watch the sun go down. It should have been nice - well it was sort of but I was really quiet - I didnt speak much at all - poor John trying to make conversation and I really didnt want to bother answering!

Now I feel bad. I feel really sad.

Earlier today John announced he was going for a walk with the boys- I was eating my lunch so I couldnt go - so when they had gone out of the door I cried! I sat there and cried and then didnt eat my lunch. I wanted to go with them! I wanted to be asked! But then I probably wouldnt have gone - you see how mad is that!

When John goes out to play football with the boys - I watch them and I get cross with John - I feel like he is rubbing it in but he isnt he is just playing with them. I feel like an outsider looking in. I dont feel like I belong - they all want John - they all do boys things - Im left out! But its all my own fault. Now the way I'm acting just makes it worse doesnt it - I'm making John cross with me.

Earlier today John cuddled me and said to me 'poor you, you have a troubled head'. So he does sympathise for a little bit!

Thank you so much for all  your kind thoughts - I think Im just having a mid-life crisis or something - I did come on today so there you go - its probably hormones! I've got so much to be thankful for, I've got a lovely man who loves me, lovely kids, a lovely dog, a lovely house - a job, friends and a beautiful place to live.  So why am I so bloody depressed!!!

Lainey xxxxxxxxx

Wierd

How wierd.

How can I feel so up and happy one day and then yesterday and today I feel so down. Nobody understands - everyone thinks I'm doing it on purpose - I keep trying to think of excuses for being down and when they come out of my mouth they sound pathetic then noone has any sympathy! I don't blame them coz to them I just seem a moody cow. I'm so sad inside and I don't know why - I hate feeling like this - I don't want to be like this. I try to snap out of it and I usually do as the day goes on. How wierd! I keep feeling left out - all the boys together and me the only girl. I feel lonely even though all my family are here. What is missing? What do I want? I havent got a clue!

I get really angry quick - like when I can't open a tin and I throw it down and get all angry - there is like so much anger to come out - then it all disappears! How wierd and I look pathetic too. Noone understands me at the moment - I dont even understand myself - I think I'm going mad! I think I need help coz I'm so so sad.

Laine xxxx

English Literature

How good is English Literature! I love it! Today in English we had a discussion about the Handmaid's Tale - it was so interesting, so ermmmmm soooo ermm oooh can't think of the words coz I'm all happy and interested and excited!  This is the first time I've ever done English Literature! Now I can't wait to read the next book!  First of all though I've got to write an essay about The Handmaid's Tale.  It means studying the book and picking out bits that interest me - bits I'm intrigued by or a character I'm really interested in. Why oh why didnt I study English Literature a long time ago - why am I only discovering it now?   My schooling was not good - I never ever ever read any Shakespeare! The school was rubbish! I did read the Mayor of Casterbridge - I remember that and we did read John Steinbeck novels. I remember how I loved it then - but I never really was given the chance to study it further.  Now I can!  My John is a bit fed up with me studying - he wants me to really start earning some money now - I know he does and its frustrating for him that I'm only working mornings at the moment so the money isnt good and I put us into alot of debt by studying the past 5 years.  But, I really don't ever want to stop studying! I think to be a good teacher I need to soak up lots of knowledge!  One day I will be working more hours and earning more money but I never ever want to be so so busy I can't study or read a book! I don't think I would like that.  I feel different today - it's wierd - but its a good wierd. Am I making sense?

Laine xxxxxxxx

The spooks didnt get me

So sorry I left you at Halloween didnt I! Well the spooks didnt get me and Im alright! Im not a very good journal person these days - I feel bad about that. I want to be able to do it all! And I can't. I likes my journal peeps and I dont forget you - Im just busy all the time! I will make a point of looking at your journals at the weekend. Remind me Sara Sara!

Work is better these days - even though the children are hard work - I know that I love them - they know I love them too.  I'm on their side and we have fun sometimes. I'm not gonna be a strict Mrs Sayers all the time - that doesnt work - children need love dont they - we all do.  But, they know that I can be cross too - see my cross face! Still Im much happier - something is working!

I've started my English Literature GCSE and also my Science GCSE! That's me I love studying dont I!

For English I'm reading The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Attwood - it's really different and it's really engaging. I'm enjoying it so that's half the battle. I've got to write an essay about it by Christmas and as I'm late starting to the class I'm a bit behind but I'll catch up hopefully. The next book is Othello - looking forward to that - I will go all Shakespeare on you - yes I will shalt thy! I never did Shakespeare at school - I missed out there! It's going to be the first time I have ever read Shakespeare!

Anyway, I'm off again with a bang - coz fireworks still going on! I will be in touch.  I do have so much to tell you but I just can't be bothered to type it all - I'm sending you my thoughts - concentrate - right now you know!

Love Laine xxx

Trick or Treat?

Trick or Treat!!!!!

Tags: Trick or treat thru j-land, Halloween, Spooky

Why I have gone private.

 Don't forget to put your clocks back! (In UK!) OOOH Sara means you get an extra hour with Chris!! xxxxx

 

Hi peeps,

Diama asked me why I'd gone private. Very good question Diama! The reason I have gone private is because of my job really.  We were told at our last inset training day that we must be very careful on the internet as because we work with children we are very vulnerable - we could be accused of all sorts. Also any child or parent wanted to find out more about me they could google in my name and get my journal so now its private they cant do that.  We are not allowed to really have Myspace or Facebook or anything like that. I do have a Myspace so Im gonna make that private too. Got to be careful now.

Lainey xxxx

p.s. I know that I havent got everybody on my sidebar so when you leave a comment can you leave your link - thanks. Laine xxxx

A funny for Saturday

Tags: computer jokes, X-factor, friends

Private Journal

Hi Everyone,

These are the peeps Im gonna add to my private journal. If you are not on my list please let me know as I dont want to miss anyone out and please dont be offended if I not got you on my list my head is all over the place! Could you all be so kind as to send me your email addresses too - I think I got most of them! Love Laine xxxxx p.s. you will all get your invite to my private journal soon xxxxx

Aileen

Cherry

Joan

Jeannette (jottings)

Jeannette (travels)

Joan

Jan (Serendipity)

Ally

Stuart

Sara Sara

Chris (Brainwhispers)

Donna (nightmaremom)

Sunflowerkat

Sandra scribbles

Marla

Lyn (brits blog)

Helen

Eileen

Jane (Rattlebox)

Sugar

Zoe

Andy (thebastard)

Happier

Hello all you lovely journal people

Im just popping in to say hi and that Im so sorry I have not been here for a while. I have been very down. All to do with the job situation. Anyway, I have told the school I am not going to do the afternoon hours anymore and that has made me feel much better.  I think it was the situation rather than me mentally that made me feel so down. My good friend has been in touch by text and he suggests I go to the Docs - well Stuart I havent actually made an appointment yet - I know I'm naughty! But I do feel a bit better and I'm getting better by the day. So I think Im going to wait a little while before I do go to see the Doc. Sara and Stuart have been very good to me - loves them I do!

Right Im off now but I will be back.

Love Lainey Laine xxxxx

Thank you

Thank you all so so much for yesterday! What a lovely bunch you all really are!!  I got really fed up today and went to the Head again - he wants me to see him again on Friday to see how I am feeling. He is good and fair with me and I appreciate that.  I do feel better but the afternoon I had today was bad very bad! I have told them that Im not going to do the afternoons if they carry on the way they are!

Thanks Chris I'd love Lamb casserole!! That would def cheer me up!!! Wish someone would cook it for me!!

Love to you all

Laine xxx

p.s. can you tell me if your not on my sidebar coz I dont rely on alerts anymore I visit people through my sidebar so if your not on it I dont visit! Please  make sure you send me your link if your not on it! Thank you so much. xxxxx

Feeling a bit better

Hello everybody,

Im so so sorry I've been away from journals - I hit an all time low last week - I don't think I could have got much lower. I think when you hit rock bottom the only way again is up and I have been getting better - slowly.

Its been a hard few weeks, starting a new job and losing a close friend.

The job is getting better although Im not sure if I will be there forever. Life is too short to be sad but as I say things are getting better so watch this space.

The school I work for have children with very challenging behaviour and emotional problems - children that most other schools would exclude - so as the school has an 'every child matters' policy we as staff have to support that and therefore have to be strong enough to deal with this behaviour - I dont think Im strong enough yet but I hopefully will get there. I want to - I nearly gave up last week but after being in tears in front of the Head and saying how I felt it lifted a huge weight. I hope that things will get better.

As for my friend well - remember I told you all about a friend of mine who left her husband for another man and said she had lots of trouble with her ex-husband. She left her husband in October last year and took the children with her.  Her ex has not yet been granted access to the children who are 11 and 14 (two girls) - anyway she has been telling me that he has been acting unreasonably and the girls dont want to see him.  Im not quite sure what it is he has done that is so bad. Well its a long story but she asked me to write a letter to her solicitor saying that her ex had sent me confidential stuff letters and that (which he had done and I read it all as he was just trying to clear his name) - well she wanted me to say that the letters were unwelcome and I dont wish him to contact me again.  I felt that me writing a letter would just add to making it difficult for him to see his girls.  So I refused to write the letter. I didnt find the letters unwelcoming infact it made me realise that my friend is going over the top a bit in stopping him seeing his girls and I didnt want to make it even harder for him.  I've chatted to him lots on the phone and he is a broken broken man.  She is not very happy with me and said I have hurt her.  God!!!! I'm fed up with people!!  I really dont know why the girls dont want to see him - what did he do that is so bad! I've have known him for 15 years and Ive known him to be a bloody good Dad!! So instincts tell me to not get involved but then now Ive lost my best friend!!!

So all that added to the stresses of a job I thought I would love Ive been pretty down lately.  Why is life so bloody hard!! I wanna just enjoy it and be happy!  Ooooh Im so sorry if all this dont make sense but Ive just come on here and blurted it out.

I miss you all and I thank you for being here.

Laine xxxxxxxxxxx

Not feeling so good

Im sorry I havent been round your journals - I do feel guilty about that - Ive not turned my alerts back on yet! Smack wrists!!

Im not really loving my job at the moment. It's hard! We have had training today - advise on how to be strict and not let the kids get to us! We have to let them know who the adult is! Also to keep being professional and not to be too friendly! I think Im guilty of being too friendly! Im not good at telling them off!  I find it very hard! I started today all day and the class Im in at the end of the day has several children who back-chat and are just plain rude! The teacher is not very strict so it is hard for me to be strict too as I dont seem to have her back-up. I'm not sure what to do! Anyway, I have to keep going and give it my best shot - I cant give up just after two weeks!  I just feel like Ive got butterflies all the time and don't want to go! I hope it gets better but Ive a horrible feeling it will get worse first!

Sorry Im not being a good journal friend at the moment!

Laine xxxx

Trying again and Im not teasing!!! LOL

right here goes again and Tells I wonder if we were in the golf the same time!!! Awwww would have loved to have met you!!!  LOL

 

My 42nd birthday celebrations in Pizza Hut, Great Yarmouth!

Joe at the play area near our tent.

Great Yarmouth seafront - time for fish and chip dinner and a new balloon!!

Beautiful sand dunes at Southwold!

Well folks the bloomin puter only lets me upload certain pics - dont worry I will sort it and put the rest on soon - so sorry about this techinical hitch!!! LOL

Love Lainey

p.s. Diama Im so glad you liked your gift - I bought that in Spain! I wanted one!! LOL

More of Great Yarmouth camping trip

Stanley comes to visit us on our first day at the tent.

Now Im cross coz I cant upload anymore pictures and Ive got loads to show you!! Any ideas anyone??

Love Laine xxxxxx

 

Camping pictures part one

Here are some of my pics from our camping holiday in Great Yarmouth - I'll do them in stages as there are a lot!!!

This is my little nephew Stanley!!! Bless him - whoops I got to go back to work!!! Yikes - more photies later I promise xxxxxx

Lainey Laine xxxx

Working at the school

Thank you to you all you are all so kind and good to me - thank you so much for all your support and Im so sorry Ive not been visiting your journals - really bad of me!! Im gonna really try hard to make a date with my puter and concentrate on journals!!  You are such good friends!

Sara thanks for offering tips to me - I probably will be wanting your advise on stuff!! I didnt have a very good day to day with little boy number one - I will call them number one, number two and number three as I cant mention names, obviously!  Well I see number one first thing til 10.15 and so far Ive had great times with him although he can be fidgety because of his ADHD - anyway, today we did not have a good day at all - It was P.E., and it was dance and he said he didnt like dance and refused to do it.  I said to him ok he didnt have to but could he sit with me for five minutes then we could go and do a puzzle.  But, the other Teaching Assistant came over and tried to get him to join in so he was rude to her and refused point blank so she told him that Mrs Sayers would take his playtime away!! Awwwww I didnt want to do that! Anyway, he ended up with no play and he was cross with me coz I had said about the puzzle but because she has been there longer and I thought she knows better I said to him well Number one you were rude to Mrs H so I have to take your play away.  He said that he wanted to trash the classroom and he was going to run away - he didnt but I felt so bad - I told him that it was disappointing that he had to behave that way and he said he didnt care so I said well then I dont care!! Awwww I didnt want to fall out with him!! I feel bad now - this is not going to be an easy job.

I had a lovely time with my boy number two though today - he is in year six and is about 10 or 11 years old.  We did maths together today and we got on really well so that was good! He has ADHD and he hasnt been in school for over two years - but we get on well.

My boy number three who is 8 years old like my number one boy!  Well I wasnt with him today - I start with him on Monday properly but Im going in to see him tomorrow.  Well I went to see him yesterday and what a scene I came across!! The poor teacher was on her own.  My boy number three was on the table throwing books at children - the children were crying and fighting. My boy number three was screaming.  I didnt know what to do I'd never done this before! Anyway, I coaxed my boy down and I told him about my Oscar - thank heaven for my Oscar!! In the end we made a book all about Dogs, Cats and Elephants! It wasnt easy though inbetween times he was very disruptive, pinching other children, shouting, kicking furniture, he pushed me, he took someones violin and started playing it (found it hard not to laugh at that point) then eventually I did calm him but heaven!!!! Ive got to do this every day!!  I wrote an email to the teacher and she wrote back saying I did a brilliant job!!! Crikey I didnt think I did! She said that together we will crack it!! I think she is lovely and I hope we can but the class is so disruptive how can I get my boy number three to calm down!!!  Anyway, he has started on a drug called retillin or something - Im not sure if thats right.  Poor little lad! Wish I could take him home - look after him, let him have nice bath, play with my doggy and sod all the school bloody rules!! Awww makes me want to cry!!  Awwww how am I gonna do this job - its hard, its hard!!! I dont know what to do - how do I stop him hitting people and swearing and running away and kicking things. When I am firm with him he doesnt listen the only time he listens to me is when Im with him just the two of us.   Ive got the plans for all the lessons now from the teacher and Im going to try devise his own little timetable of events in short time spans as he is ADHD and we think autistic too, also think he has tourettes.  Watch this space Im not sure this is the job for me!! And may I say well done if you read all this!!!  Any advise is more than welcome!!!

Love Lainey Laine

p.s. my John away tonight and Im missing him madly!!!

 

An old friend is back

Hi everyone,

Sorry I have been away for so long - I'll explain why in a minute but just got to tell you an old friend is back our lovely Aileen - please go visit her and welcome her back - she has had very poor health lately and she needs some good old journal love passed on!! Awww so glad she is back!!

Anyway, I started my new job last week so I've been tired and busy! No excuse I know but anyway Im back now so stop moaning.  The job has started well - I am with two boys one is age 8 and one is age 11.  I with one before first break the I go and see the other one after first break.  So far its not been too bad - I am just finding my feet there though and I dont think Im being strict enough so I really have to improve that or them little kids will get the better of me.  Anyway, end of my first week and the Headmaster calls me in - scary!! Yes even when your 42!! hee hee!!  Anyway, he congratulated me on a good start and has offered me more hours!! eeeeeek!!  He asked if I would like to work with a child that is the most challenging child in the school.  The poor lad has numerous emotional problems, he is on the autistic spectrum and they think he is schzeprhenic - no way do I know how to spell that!!  They also think he has terets. Bless him - little lad - he is only 8 - he is a big handful, he swears, he kicks, he is very violent sometimes.  Anyway, Im to work with him afternoons - so another ten hours added on my week.  I have said yes but to have reviews often to see how Im getting on - I have requested that myself as I dont want to be doing it if its not working for me or the child.

I hope you are all ok. Diama did you get your package I have sent it! I will come visit you all as soon as I can.

Love Lainey

p.s. I will also be putting on my camping pics soon - specially for Sara Sara xxxxxx

 

Im back

Hey everyone Im back.

My case turned up - think I might have told you that already!!! Hey Diama gonna get to that post office on Monday! LOL

We had a lovely holiday camping with the kids - the campsite was a bit naff but we made the best of it.  We were right next to the night club!!! Our tent was lovely!! Its huge and loads of room and really cozy too! We love our tent! It was easy to put up and take down - and huge!! said that already! but it is huge! It was the biggest tent on the site and I think people were jealous - oh yes they were!! hee hee

I hope Stuart enjoyed his ramble out in his caravan!! I want a caravan! Our tent was lovely but you get a loo in a caravan - no loo in a tent - you have to get out in the middle of the night and get all cold - that was the only thing I didnt like!

My Sara Sara is so happy - so I'm so happy!!! yay!!!!!!!!!!

Im not well today - had a very very bad tummy - not good! Feel dizzy now and not well at all - so all feel sorry for me!

Wrote a huge long email to Sara and lost it - so that annoyed me! Havent got the energy to write all that again.

I start work on Monday! Cant beleive it - it has come round so quick! Boys start school on Tuesday - Joe going to his new school.

I think Ive upset a friend but not sure - and it was to keep another one happy - Sara I need you!!!

Laine xxxxx

A film with me in it!!!!

Click on the link of the film! It's me being interviewed at my degree show!!

Click on me!!

Lainey xxx

Tuesday

Hello all and thanks for visiting me yesterday even though Ive not got my alerts on and visiting you I really appreciate you coming to me! Ive just not had time to visit you all yet - I will truly make up for it when I get back from hols!!

notes to the peeps:

Stuart: We are going to Breydon Water Holiday Park in Great Yarmouth - google it in and you'll see! It's one of those parks with everything - shops, restaurants and swimming pools etc. So not a true camping experience as we have everything on site!

Eileen: Thanks the boys had a great time with my Mum and Dad! They are now really excited about going camping!

Sara my lovely Sara: Thanks for missing me and all your comments on Myspace - you really did think of me every day - what a lovely friend you are!! Lots of hugs and kisses for you! Whoops sorry just did a purple burp!! pardon me!

Diama! They found my case Diama! yay!! That means your gift is safe! Awww I do hope you like it - I wont be able to send it to you til I get my case back - which will probably be after my hols now - so awww your gonna have to wait bit longer! I hope its not a let down when you do finally get it!

Sugar, Jan and Terry: thanks for the birthday wishes!! Im really going to be 21 again! 42!! Hee hee. xxx

Love Laine xxxx

Majorca was lovely

Hello all,

Sorry its been so long! I've just come back from Majorca! Oh what a wonderful time we had and what lovely sandy beaches there are there. And what lovely heat over 30 C everday!! Yay it was lovely!!

Flippin Thomas Cook though have lost my suitcase - I just hope it turns up soon as its got all my clothes in it coz I take everything on holiday  - awwwwww and Diama if your reading I bought you a lovely gift and its in my case - so I hope it comes back so I can sent it to ya!!

I'm away again on 24th (my birthday!) and we are going camping til 31st - so I wont be puttting my alerts back on yet!! Miss you all.

Love Laine xxxxx

Heloooo

Hello everyone - I hope you are all enjoying the summer - I just popped by to say Hi. I might get a chance to visit you all this week.  My kids are going to my Mum and Dad's for a few days. To have some Nanny and Grandad time. They likes that!  Anyway, I've got to do all the housework and stuff whilst they are away and when I've got some spare time Im gonna catch up with all you guys. I miss you all but I tend not to have puter on much in summer hols.

Did I tell ya John and I have booked our holiday to Majorca!! yay!!! We go on 11th August and come back on 19th then we are all off to Norfolk camping on 24th August to 31st August. Awww means I got to get up really early on my birthday (24th)!

We have got our tent - its huge!!!! Looks lovely though and we are all excited and stuff! hee hee

Right take care all and see you soon Im off again!!

Love Laine xx

1.35 am

I cant believe im still up its 1.35 am in the morning!! Will have to have lay til 9 to recover! Thats if I can sleep LOL

Im just popping in to say that Im so sorry Ive not been over to your journals to see y'all. Ive not had puter on much and as its summer hols now I doubt I will be on puter much at all - so Im turning alerts off for now - I'm away for a while so take care folks and have a lovely summer hols!!

Love Laine xxxx

 

We went to Devon

Went to Devon to see Irene and her family.

When I was married to my ex and Irene was married to her ex - we were sort of related. Irene was married to my husbands uncle.  And, Irene had Katie around the same time I had my Sam.  Me and Irene were very close for years. But, then she broke up with George and I broke up with Dave. I got with John and she got with Derek - we met up a few times and then I moved and she moved and we didnt see each other for years but we still kept in touch.

Anyway, it was her 50th birthday this weekend and she asked us to come and we said yes! I'm so glad that we went - we had such a lovely time. It was lovely to see them all again. Toby, Irene's eldest, I first met when he was 2 and now he is nearly 20!! yikes! Katie I've know since she was born (14 now!) and I had lots of cuddles with her this weekend. Sam and Joe were really pleased to see her too - she is their second cousin. They love her to bits.

We thought at first we wouldnt enjoy ourselves, as we didnt know anyone at the party apart from Irene's family. But, John and I just went on in and partied and danced and had a good time. It was brilliant. But, I didnt sleep very well - John and I slept in the caravan and the party went on til 3am! Then we had to drive all the way home today.  Took us 7 hours to get there on Saturday and 5 hours to get home today but it was sooooooooo worth it and after not seeing them all for about 5 years it was great to see them all again. I dont want to leave it so long next time!

We looking for a tent for our camping trip at end of August - found a lovely one today its a Pescara 8 (Royal) - we have looked at so many!! Think that is the one for us!

Sorry I've not been reading journals - I cant sit at puter for too long - does my back in at the moment! Also Im so so tired! Awwww I will get round to you soon!

Love Laine xx

I've got a myspace

This is the first day of the skool holidays! yay! Had a lay in we did this morning me and my boys! Then we went into town together.  Joe and I bought the books that were missing from our Harry Potter collection and now we have them all!  Sam bought Sims Pets for the Playstation 2 - its really good! Im waiting for him to get fed up with it!! LOL

Sam has just made me into a Sim and Ive got a great dane but it looks like a dalmation and its name is Ricky! I think my dog will be the best one!

Just found out yesterday that I will be working with one of my neighbours at the school - she already had a job there and she told me yesterday that we will be working together - must go see her later get some more info!!

If any of you have go My Space then go add me to your friends by clicking on the link you can see myspace!! I quite like it there and it  might be a place for me when I finally get this mac code and go on to virgin - Im fed up with AOL they not given me the code yet and Im really cross!

Here is the link http://www.myspace.com/lainey2465

But Im still keeping this journal going - I kinda feel at home here and I love all my J-land friends.

Love Laine xx

Joe left Robsack today!

This is Joe with his friend's Jordan and Jack. Jordan, Jack, Joe. This was in Le Touquet in France last week.

Here is a picture when we were waiting to go in the sea life centre in Boulogne (dont know how to spell that!) - I really like this picture he is with his favourite teacher Miss Halls (Rachel) - she taught Joe for two years. She wasnt his teacher this year but she was involved in year six so he got to see her for literacy lessons. My Joe is the one on her right - our left! I put this picture in her farewell card today - she loved it. She is leaving the school to work at a school nearer her home. We will miss her very much - she is just the best teacher! I will keep in touch with her.

Joe's class did a lovely assembly this morning they sang songs to the tunes of Sound of Music - it was really good and very sad - we all cried. We dont want our children to grow up and move to senior school! I filmed the assembly so Joe and I have always got that to look at!  It will seem wierd for me when I drop the boys off to school in September and then drive to Robsack on my own - no Joe :0(

My baby boy has grown up!

Laine xxx

 

I'm graduated!

Will post more tomorrow!

I had a good day!

Laine xxxx

Happier and back better!!

:o) <----- Happy look Sara me happy - so Sara happy too!! Look see ----> :0)

Thanks for all your hugs yesterday - I did need them!

Better now - all better now!

Horrible pain gone - nasty, nasty horrible pain - hated it - cried I did!

Tomorrow is my big day - the day I wear the cap and gown! Hee hee - I shall feel all important!

Wish you could all come with me!

Will put pics in as soon as I can.

Love Laine xxx

I did purple coz I like it!

 

Tags: purple, Barney the dinosaur, Im in a silly mood

Bloomin Back and feeling sad

Hmmmmm

and

Hmmmmmm again.

I missed out on going out and having pictures taken with John's family because of my bloomin back! Been fed up all day - here all alone and feeling sorry for myself. Now Im not part of that family day.

Oh crikey why am I moaning! I just seen the pictures of the towns under flood water - oh my god! Its awful - I feel so sorry for them - what's happening to our country - its really scary!

Im gonna stop moaning!

Laine x

Saturday pain

Im in pain today - immense pain - its my flippin back - sometimes it just sends very bad pains through my foot and its bad - very bad - I have to lay in bed in a certain position until it subsides - it didnt subside today - now Im drugged to me eyeballs! Its calmed down a bit - I just hope it goes away - it normally only lasts a day.

Hope you are all having a good weekend!

Me and John have booked our holiday - we are going to Majorca on the 11th August for a week - just the two of us but we havent told the kids because we dont want to upset them - we cant afford to take them but John really needs a break - they are all on holiday that week, John's kids with their mum and my kids with their dad.  We feel so guilty not taking them but we are going to take them camping at the end of August for a week - we are going to go to Norfolk with them and then maybe we can meet with my brother too as he lives in Norwich.  The kids will love camping and seeing my brother, my sister-in-law and little Stanley.  So anyway we have decided we are not going to tell the kids we are going abroad especially as we are going to the place we took them last year and they loved it - we shall miss the kids so much but we just cant afford for all of us to go.

Laine xxxx

Whoops D I might need your help! Dont think the animation is working sorry hun - hey folks this is supposed to be animated - isnt it lovely - a tag from D's Designs.

Friday

Hmmmm Brains thinks my John is serious looking - yeah he is isnt he! I must find a better pic to put on my sidebar! I can't find a good one of me and John - but I will eventually!

Did bog all today - nothing - nowt - zilch!

Last night it thundered all night - Oscar and thunder dont mix.  When I went to bed last night I was shattered - I knew I would sleep (coz most nights I dont) and when my head hit the pillow I was off for a lovely slumber.  But, Oscar decides to whimper at the door and he has to go downstairs coz he dont like the thunder. So I stumbles down behind him - with my eyes barely open - coz John does not wake up at all!

So this morning after staying up nearly all night with Oscar I slept - I was happy sleeping and I slept til 12.00 mid-day! Then at lunch-time John and I went into town - so I did do something I spose!

Do you know that the whole country has had rain today and we had none at all! YAY! Even the sun came out!

Weekend here again! Having my hair done tomorrow - highlighted and cut. About time -not had my hair done for ages! Got to look nice for my graduation on Tuesday! OOOOH its Tuesday! LOL

On Sunday we are meeting up with John's brother and his family as we are going to have lots of photos taken.  It is John's mum and dad's wedding anniversary on the 10th August (50th!!) thats their golden! So we are going to put together an album of all of us and the kids for them! My idea!

If you are not on my sidebar could you please put your journal link with your comment so I can add you on. Thanks xxx

Have a good weekend all. Lainexxxx

Thanks for the tag Donna.

 

Thursday- Today I have a story for you.

YAY Gina managed to comment on my journal - thanks Gina! YAY - welcome to journal land hun!

Did my micro teach today - I hated doing it! I chose to talk about fractions - silly subject to talk about really. Anyway, didnt like it one bit! Bit worrying seeing as I want to be a teacher LOL!

Anyway, in English this afternoon my tutor said she loved my little short story I wrote and I had to read it out to the class - so now I'm going to write it here just for all of you. Are you sitting comfortably? Then I shall begin.

The hardest decision.

She stood there wondering what she should do next. Alone in a world of confusion. A state of mind never felt before. So frightening to not be in control, "Why can't I control my life anymore?" she thought. "What is outside this mind state I am in?" Why can't I operate? Why can't I think? Am I losing my mind?

It had been a big decision, a hard decision, but one that needed to be made. If it wasn't made then she would go mad, insane, crazy! Nobody can help. No-one can make decisions for you. She turned and looked at her children playing happily. They had no idea that their world was about to crash around them. Nothing would ever be the same again. She took a huge breath and turned to her husband who was still talking. He had been talking for the last ten minutes, nagging her, interrogating her, really getting at her. He got to her so much that she had learn't to block him out. She had this brilliant knack of being able to go into her own world, pretend he wasn't there anymore.

"It's over" she said, staring right through him as if he wasn't ever there.

"Oh, right. Just like that then." he shouted.

Typical, she thought. Typical answer. She didn't care anymore. She had become numb, hardened, stronger.

"Yes, just like that." She smiled at him.

"Right, so who is telling the kids then?" he snarled.

"Well, I don't think it's the time orplace for that", she said in annoyance.

She ran over to her children and embraced them. They are all she had now. "It's just you and me kids", she thought as she cuddled them close.

Five years later.............

She will never forget that day, the day she made the hardest decision of her life. The pain, the confusion, the emptiness. She just can't believe that her life was so miserable. The children are so happy now; she is so happy now. He went away out of their lives, the best thing he could ever have done. It was hard on the children at first. They missed thier daddy so much. She felt guilty, as if she had driven him away. Now she is in her new life, new man and new dreams.

Well Im sure you will guess that that is a true story and its about me! Yes it is! I'm going to be writing lots of little short story type creative writing type thingies! So I will write them in here when I've done them! Share them with you all.

Love Laine xxxx

 

Just for my Gina

I wasn't going to write an entry tonight and my friend Gina texted me and said 'oh no, no journal'. Bless her - well here I am hun - Im here!! Look - its me!! YAY Gina hasn't got AOL so she cant comment but I know she reading!

Well I don't feel myself today.

Had a very very unproductive day. I really didnt feel like doing anything at all. On Monday I really was motivated and tied up my bedroom. Today I was sposed to do the lounge and I didnt! Couldnt be bothered. In fact, I went back to bed and read my book for ages - like nearly all day!! Ha Ha!!!

Well I didnt sleep very well last night so probably why I was lazy.

Went round my friend Joe's after school for a cuppa. Maria and Carol were there too. Nice when we all get together - it will seem weird when my Joe not at that school anymore. I wonder if I will still meet up with them as much - I hope I do!!! Im sure I will!! But my little Joe will have moved on and have new friends.

John and I had a very lovely walk along Bexhill Beach tonight - the sea was right out and we walked along the sands in the sunlight.  It was lovely - quite romantic really.

I've got my teaching lesson tomorrow and I've got to think of a micro-teach to do to the rest of the class - got to be 15 minutes long - Ive left it a bit late - I cant think of anything to do!!! yikes!!! I best get on with it.

Love Lainey xxxxxxx

 

Hello again hello I just stopped to say Hello

I don't know why but I feel like singing! Silly me.

Sugar was the first person to comment in my new journal!!! YAY for Sugar - so coz she was the first one I'm gonna use one of her tags so its the first tag in my new journal!! YAY

That's a lovely tag to put in my journal for a start - thanks Sug!!!

And lovely lovely Sara she put the most comments in my new journal - 3!!! Bless her!

Today I bought two more books to read. A while back Sara recommended a book by Dean Koontz - 'Watchers' - I loved it - it was fantastic - so I bought another one by him called 'False Memory' and I am loving that too! Sara you got me into Dean Koontz now! Anyway, today in Tesco they did an offer of two Dean Koontz books for a fiver! So I bought 'The Taking' and 'The Face' - have you read them Sara? Now I can't wait to read my current one to get on to read the next!! hee hee - I loves it when Ive got books lined up to read.

Im missing Stuart - I do hope he is having a good time on his hols!!

AOL havent sent me the code yet to de-activate my account - grrrrrrrrrrr. I cant wait to get on virgin and see what its like - Im especially excited that I can do my journal from my internet explorer - YAY!! I hope it still stays like that when Virgin are in!

Right Im off now - you take care all!! Diama I still havent forgot you and I wont! You know what I mean hun! LOL I'm looking for that special something that I knows you will like!

Love Laineyxxx

 

Here it is a new beginning

It feels like a new beginning - new journal - new life!

I feel better - I feel happier.

I think I'm getting more positive - that's good!

I start my new job in September and I'm looking forward to that.

I'm graduating next week and that will mark the end of one era and the start of another.

I've got more motivated - I've started sorting my life, organising things and sorting things - I feels much better I do!

I even got this new journal that I can hopefully still use even though AOL won't be my internet provider anymore soon.  So let's hope this works guys and let me know what you think of my new journal - I will be adding you all to my sidebar soon! So leave your journal link when you comment please.

Love Lainey Laine xxxxxx