Ree's new journal

My lovely friend Ree who I have known on AOL for quite some time now has just started a journal - please make her welcome - her first entry is done!

http://journals.aol.co.uk/sexymids1/rees-world/

Thanks xxxxxxx

Feeling Happier

Well, I've dyed my hair Rich Auburn - I have! Im a new woman! LOL - Look at the pics - I tried to get all angles so you could get a good look at the colour. What do ya think! Im not blonde anymore!! yikes!!

 

 

 

Hee hee! That's me that is! LOL I can change my hair colour shame I can't make my face any better! LOL

Love Laine xxx

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Feeling happy.

Thank you so so much to everyone - I know I keep saying it but I really mean it. All your advise and comments were valued to me, each and every one of them! I have taken advise and I haven't had a further go at their Dad - I was going to send him an email to say 'who did he think he was having a go at me like that!'  But I thought, after reading all your comments, it was wise to just leave alone! In future too Im not going to rise to his bait and get all wound up by him. Im going to ignore him!

Sam and Joe have said to me that they want their hair long still but they would like it in a proper style - fair enough. If they want it sorted then I will sort it for them. Not him!!! I was done doing anything for him the day I told him to clear off! And yes it was the best thing I ever done was get rid of him! I've got my John now and he is the best thing, apart from my boys, to ever happen to me.

I went back to work today - it was good because we are back to normal now and cleaning lodges normally. The people that had stayed in the lodges I cleaned left them really really messy, washing up and left all their rubbish!

John has told me he doesnt want me doing extra cleaning jobs - so I had to cancel the people I was going to see tomorrow. John said that it even though we need the money my health is more important and he said that he loves me so much he doesnt want me hurting myself. Bless him. We do need the money though! John said we will just have to go without rather than me cleaning for other people!  Still least I tried! I might find something esle to fill in the days Im not at the holiday park!

I do love my John!

My boys are excited coz their new beds arrived today! Its always nice when you get a new bed - I remember that when I was little. They ran in from school and went straight up to see them! Hee hee!

Thank you again all of you for visiting me! That uplifted me like you wouldnt believe! I'm still going to do my own alerts for a while because I dont think the AOL ones are working  and I will try visit you all too!

Love Laine xxx

P.S. I found a picture of the ring that John bought me from Ernest Jones for Valentine's day. xxx

Tags: Ernest Jones, love, eternity

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My boys are home and thank you so so much

Hello you wonderful wonderful people. You are so so brilliant that I nearly cried! I can't believe the response. You helped me so much - each and everyone of you. You did really you did!

Here are my boys home from their Dad's

As you can see their hair is quite long and I do agree it does need cutting but up to Friday they were telling me to leave it alone they wanted it long. When they got in from their Dad's they said Mummy can we have our hair restyled. I took on alot of your tips and I told them that I liked their hair as it was and that if they wanted it trimmed that was no problem at all. Then Joe piped up, don't worry Mummy it's not your fault! Now what did that mean? I asked him what it meant and he wouldnt tell me. Anyway, I wish, so wish I had never responded to that text and I will get their hair done if they want it done but not because my ex has told me to! Crikey I wish you lot were all here to come beat him up with me like Sara and Eileen said they would!

I do so wish their Dad didnt exist - not a nice thought I know but that's how I feel. Exactly why he is my ex!! Anyway, I really, really do appreciate your comments I really do and Im going to read them all again now.

Love Lainey xxxxx

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I need your advise Journal friends warning very long entry!

This is the last straw, I’m fed up with my boys Dad telling me what to do – I’m not married to him anymore and why the hell should he make me feel guilty. It might seem petty to all of you but I’m gonna show you what I have to put up with and I want, need, your advise as to what I’m going to write to him in an email to let him know how out of order he is!

 

I will just let you into a brief history of when I was married to him. The reason I ended up divorcing him was because he seemed to like telling me what to do. Or he would tell me off when I had done something he didn’t like.  For example, if I got too drunk at a party and was actually enjoying myself! Anyway, when I went through my divorce I had to go to counselling and I remember even then he used to interrogate me and I nearly ended up having a nervous breakdown. Hard to really give you all a picture of loads of stuff that went on years ago. But, basically he annoys me immensely! Anyway, when we were going through out divorce he announces he is going off to live in California, he did, he left his kids and lived there for two years. Now, that’s something I could never ever do, my kids are my world! I also reluctantly let my babies fly out to be with their Dad for three whole weeks!  He even turned it round then to be my fault saying I pushed him into having to go live there! I used to actually start to believe that all these things were my fault. He even told my boys a load of lies about me! I never ever, and have never said anything to my boys about their Dad. After two years he comes back and thinks he can just carry on as he left off – demanding to see the kids at weekends etc. Well I told him he could only see them once a fortnight as I did not want to suddenly lose the weekends with my children altogether.  Anyway, since he has been back he has found little things to pick at me with. 

 

So let’s fill you in on why I’m so annoyed now. My Sam is 14 and my Joe is 12. They are teenagers and I let them do what they like to a certain degree! Of course! But, basically they are good kids and in our house we are fairly laid back and we are happy, very happy!  My ex- husband isn’t very happy in his relationship at the moment and I think that when he is not happy he cant bare me being happy. He has been in 4 relationships since we divorced and I have only been in one – so that says it all really doesn’t it!.  Im going on now and not getting to the point!  Anyway, my Sam and Joe have decided to grow their hair long, I don’t mind coz I like long hair on boys, they are going through this Emo, Goth stage – you know, wearing black and having long hair is cool when you’re a teenager. I have to let them go through it coz that’s me, laid back and hopefully a cool mum! Hee hee! Anyway, I quite like the Goth look! The main thing is they are not out on the streets causing trouble, they are happy and content and have an aim in life. If they want long hair, let them I say!

 

So I get this text message yesterday while the boys are at their Dad’s;

 

Would it be possible to get the boys hair cut before they come down next time. Serena could only do it for them when they had it done with clippers. (Ok, right nothing wrong with that I hear you say. It annoyed me because I don’t like him telling me what to do. He has a wedding to go to the next time boys are down so that is why he wants their hair cut. So in my mind I think, well I’m not bothered at the mo whether it’s cut or not, also I can’t afford it, also I’m not sure if we will have time. His Serena did used to clipper my boys hair, without asking me first! Also, they took it upon themselves to suddenly be in charge of the boys hair so I let them get on with it!) So I texted back.

 

Take them to a barbers today if you can would be best. (Now in this reply Im not being funny or anything just suggesting that it might be best if he took them if he had time, didn’t say I wouldn’t)

 

So his reply was;

 

Don’t know why you cant take them in the next few weeks. I always seem to have to take them. (Unbelievable! I take my boys to school everyday, never think about it, I take my boys out to their friends houses, to their clubs, give them money for extras, love them, play with them, feed them, clothe them, be a mum to them, I do it because I want to, they are my kids. I don’t text him and say it’s not fair! He took it upon himself to suddenly start doing their hair! I never asked him! He went and left his sons for two years, two years they didn’t have a Dad!)

 

So I text back.

 

Well Im not bothered whether they have hair cut or not so if you want it done you get it done! (Well Im angry by this point, he is being so bloody petty!)

 

Then I get this text;

 

Well your sons want to have their hair cut. Don’t know why I should always be the one to take them. So your happy to have them walking around so scuffy. (This is when I lost it and threw my phone nearly damaging it. You see he made me a nervous wreck when we were married and I still have that laying dormant in me, that depression I had and nervousness I had comes to the surface when he has a go at me. I wish it wouldn’t! Anyway, see how he uses ‘your sons’ to mentally get at me as if to say you are their mother and you’re a crap one!  Then when he says why should I always be the one to take them, well I never ever asked him to take them ever! Of course Im not happy to let them walk about scruffy, I don’t think they look scruffy, it’s the look that a lot of the teenagers have at the mo! You see how he tries to make me feel so guilty! He comes over all important like he is always right, so why did he leave them for two years! Grrrr there is a lot more I could say but I don’t want to bore you anymore than I have!)

 

Anyway, then I get a text from my Joe saying ‘How are you Mummy’, I also get a text from Sam saying Hello Mummy hope you are having a good weekend. That made me wonder if  their Dad was moaning about me in front of them as my boys never text me when they are at their Dad’s. Then Joe texted me and says ‘please can we have our hair trimmed mummy?’ Says it all doesn’t it! Once my Joe came back, a few months ago now, really upset as this Serena had slagged me off to my boys, told them I was lazy and because I was at college should get off my arse and do some work! My Joe was so upset about that and has never forgiven her. Apparently their Dad told her off but I just wonder if now this weekend my boys have had to listen to her rant and rave about me not doing their hair.

 

What do I do?

 

Laine xxxxx

Hello out there world.

Hello out there all you in journal world. I haven't written anything this week for a few reasons really. One being that I feel that it's a bit off expecting people to read my journal when I don't read anyone elses very often - and I feel bad about that but I just don't have the computer on much and don't get much time to visit you all. I try every now and then to try catch up with you all and I have not forgotten any one of you! You hear?!!!

I also haven't really had much to say - I've been a bit down this week. I haven't had any work and I didn't know when I would be working again. You see we finished the winter clean and then when the park opened again there wasn't many bookings, therefore, no work. So I just was moody all week and bored, bored, bored, bored! I need to work or do something - I need to feel needed.

Anyway, lots has happened this week, oh yes it has! I feel betterer today! I do! See Im smiling, see! Now where shall I start.

Work: I go back to work next Monday - so feel betterer about that. Also, my neighbour, and friend, Sally. (I used to work with her at the school). Well she is like my new friend at the mo! Hee hee I likes new friends! We have gotten quite close lately. She has finished at the school and being that she only lives two doors away from me in our little Close - we keep popping into each other for coffee! She has kept me going this week. Well, I got her a job at Crowhurst. Well she got it herself really but I told her about it. So we are going to be partners at work! Yay!!! I likes my new friend!

Me: I put an Ad in the Friday Ad for cleaning! I thought I would try start my own business up! I've had one enquiry so far! Which is good and promising - I hope that something comes of it! It will be useful to try fit cleaning in with my GCSEs and also be able to stay at Crowhurst too! So I will let you know how that goes! I got a call from a lady who is 8 months pregnant and needs help round the house. She will ring back on Monday to say whether she wants to see me or not! I'm saying that I will charge £8.50 an hour for a minimum of two hours. I dont think that is over the top as I would have to pay for my petrol too and then when eventually the tax man takes some off me I need some left! Hee hee! So Im going to stick at that rate for now. Im quite excited about it I hope I can build up clients.

This week we decided that we WILL get another dog. I want to get one before Oscar gets too old. So this week, in the Friday Ad, there was a golden retriever, age 2, family dog £50.00. We were nearly tempted but due to lack of funds we didnt go for it. It's not just the £50. it's all the extras too and if I do get another doggy I want to be able to get it everything it needs! I think Oscar needs a friend he is such a sociable dog! I think I would like to get a puppy though. So if I do well in my job and get lots of pennies that is our next venture! yay!!!

I'm still doing well with my studies and today we had Michael Foster, MP for Hastings, in to look around and I had a word with him about why there wasnt any teacher training opportunities in Hastings and why was it so hard for adults to get into colleges for GCSEs! My tutor said I told him exactly what she wanted, so that was good! Horizons, where I do my learning, needs more funding so he was the man to talk to! Hopefully!!

Anyway, I must go and give my Oscar his tea and my laptop is about to run out of power!!! yikes!!

Love Laine xxxxx

Happy Mother's Day

Happy Mother's Day to all you mum's out there! Not only Mum's of children but Mum's of our furry folks too!

I went into good ole Marks and Sparks yesterday and bought my Mum and John's Mum some gorgeous gorgeous flowers. They do really lovely selections in Marks. I nearly bought myself some! I know I wont get any!

John tried to persuade my boys to go with us down town as he wanted to take them in to Marks and get me something nice. The boys couldnt be bothered to go with John! That made me a bit sad. They are growing up and I miss the time when they were so excited to do something nice for me on birthdays and Mothers Day. Teenage boys don't really get excited about things like that! My boys are good boys but they are growing up too quick and I dont like it! I kept remebering the excited smiley little faces of when they were about 4 and 6 and they would climb up on to my bed and wake me up with a surprise! Awwwwwww I want them ickle again! Awwwwwwww Spose this is the day when we reminise on times like that.

Well now Ive got to go and get ready, tidy up and make sure there is no dust as both mum's are coming for tea!!!

Love Laine xxxxx