Friday 15 February 2008

My step-daughter

 Me and Em at Christmas 2007.

When I first met John his daugher Emma was only 12 nearly 13. Emma and I hit it off straight away and became very very close. She used to share secrets with me, come shopping with me, have duvet days with me and we had such fun together.

When Emma turned to about 15/16 she started to go a bit off and funny with me - I didn't really take alot of notice at first but one day she turned round to John and said she didnt want anything to do with me and that if he told John the reason why it would split us up. I was devastated I missed her so much. I used to enjoy spoiling her coz I didnt have a girl of my own.

I kept blaming myself and wondering what I had done wrong. I went over everything in my mind - it drove me mad! I remember one incident when Emma was about 15, I went pick her up one day to go shopping and she ran out of her house crying, she ran straight into my arms and said that everyone hated her. Her mum was standing at the door and the look she gave me was daggers! Things went downhill from then on with me and Emma!

Anyway, John and I decided that it would be best for me to just stay away from Em and that John would see her on his own. When she got to 17 she needed driving lessons and John used to take her out - she was a bit off with him too but at least she was seeing him. John and I had done arguing about it - it wasnt worth it getting between us plus he needed to still keep his relationship with her. I used to sob my heart out and I missed her so much. Anyway, when she was about to take her test she asked John to take her on the test route and I went with them - she was a bit cagey at first but from that day on we started to get on again. 

When she was 18 she wanted to look at a university in Edinburgh and she asked John to go with her - I saw this as a perfect opportunity to bond with her again so asked if I could go too. She said yeah that would be brilliant - from that day on we have gradually got our relationship back - its not as close as it used to be - she has a boyfriend now so she is busy with him anyway, but she hugs me when she sees me and is chatty and Ifeel Ive got her back. I have kept my distance a bit as I dont want to be hurt again.

Anyway, tomorrow I have arranged to go to London with John's sister-in-law and I thought I would invite Emma along too as we havent been out together like that for ages. She was really excited to come out with me and the other night I rang her and she asked if we could meet up earlier so we had time on our own before we met Debbie. Emma said that she missed seeing me on my own and that she has something to tell me!! She said, "Laine we dont get any time on our own anymore and it will be nice to have a good chat and a coffee before we meet Debbie" I am so so pleased I cant tell you! I really cant wait for tomorrow - I feel like Ive got her back! She is 20 in April - so she is growing up and probably more sensible too! She has never ever said what the problem was she had with me and I put it down to 16 year olds! Anyway, all I care about is that I have her back in my life again and that makes me very happy.

I'm going to suggest to Em tomorrow that we arrange a day just the two of us. I will let you know what she wants to tell me!

Laine xxxxxxxx

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

As you say it was probably her being a typical ,teenager and we all know how cussed they can be ,or maybe her Mother had been working on her ? it happens ! Iam pleased whatever the reason ,she is  acting like a nice adult now ..love Jan xx

Anonymous said...

I am so glad you have got your relationship back on track.  It was probably hard for her at the time being between her mum and dad and feeling disloyal to her mum for liking you.  You don't even know if her head was filled with nonsense from her mum's side too.  Hope you have a lovely time together.  Eileenx

Anonymous said...

Don't tell me about 15/16yr olds...............grrr!!! You think girls are bad with all their raging hormones? Boys are a....in my experience.....worse!!! They become aliens!!! Enjoy your day tomorrow 'Lainey, I'll be thinking of you, say hello to the big smoke for me, I have not been home in ages!!! love Joany Joan!!!

Anonymous said...

Hi Laine, I think you are right about being sixteen, hormones cause so many problems with teens. I`m so glad you both have a good relationship again.

Love Sandra xxxx

http://journals.aol.com/labdancer51/SandrasScribbles

Anonymous said...

That is great that you two are getting close again. I hope things work out for you both. Helen

Anonymous said...

Those early teenage years can be tough can't they... I'm so glad that Emma is back in your life again now honey, I know how much that means to you.  Have to say, you have been very understanding Lainey, not pressing her to know what the problem was, and always making an effort to get your relationship back on track.  You are lovely you know :o)  Have a great day tomorrow won't you.
Sara Sara   xxx

Anonymous said...

are you going to ask why she starting being different to you or u gonna leave that alone?